Wednesday, November 01, 2006,2:40 AM
Neverending Story
I'm anxiously waiting for an acceptance or rejection letter from Pace. This is an all too familiar feeling. Looking back, I've been waiting for acceptance (or rejection) from schools almost all my life.
I think it all started when I came to the U.S. when I was 4 and my mom tried to get me into a particular school for kindergarten. I'm not quite clear if this was an especially exclusive school or what. All I remember is my mom holding my hand tightly and crying as we walked back to the car because the school wouldn't accept me. Apparently, my inability to speak English at 4 years old meant that I did not have the mental capacity to learn. I think I remember that day vividly because even then, at that young age, I felt the prejudice of those school officials and the injustice of it all. I may not have known that that was what I felt, but I felt it nonetheless. To this day, their narrow-mindedness still hurts and amazes me. That school was in central New Jersey. My mom found another school for me to attend. I believe my mom explained to this second school what had happened. As it turned out, I was already ahead of many of my other classmates - I already knew my alphabet and my numbers and could identify them the fastest. My kindergarten teacher, I believe, called that first school and told them what asses they were. Ok, maybe he didn't quite use those words, but I do know that he informed them of their mistaken assumptions. Those assholes.
The second time I waited for an acceptance was for a specialized high school I applied to - Bronx Science. Four people got accepted in my eight grade class of 24 students and thank God I was one of them. Thinking about it now, I'm so glad my mom didn't have to pay for my high school. I had a great education, met a diverse group of people and had a pretty good time. I often see and read about how people thought high school was such an agony - the drama, the insecurities, the hostilities, the teenage angst. I don't know why, but I seem to have missed all that. Oh, I had some drama (like when I almost didn't graduate, but that's another story altogether), however, high school wasn't so bad. In fact, I have some pretty good memories. Lucky me, I guess.
Of course, senior year of high school comes with the college application process which is usually hell. Had to wait again. Got in to U. of Philippines. Got in to Binghamton. Cool. Rejected from Columbia. Eh, pretty much knew that was coming but it was good to dream.
Then, there was the more recent Fordham application. Got in, graduated, and was outta there. Unfortunately, my major wasn't my thing so there goes $80,000 worth of education down the drain.
Hence my application to Lehman for nursing prereqs. Got in. That was a no-brainer.
And now, my application to Pace and only Pace for the accelerated BSN/MS program. Finally. A way to combine my college major with a career. Nursing Informatics. Maybe that $80,000 will be put to use after all. Unfortunately, if I don't get in, I'll have to wait longer to graduate and I'm not getting any younger.
So here I am again. Waiting. Will I get in? I really don't know. My grades in college weren't the best but my GPA for Lehman is 3.97. That should count for something, right? And I got a freaking 780 in my GRE math and a 700 in the verbal. Not to be immodest, but that's a pretty good score (considering I guessed most of the math section). I found out my friend, who's a near genius (went to Ivy League, is a scientist who works for the government, etc) got a 720 in math. How the hell did I get a 780? I seriously think its one of the great mysteries of the world, or at least my world. I don't think my personal statement was that great though. I'm cursing myself for not putting more thought into it. For not being more funny, more interesting, more attention-grabbing, more heart-wrenching...I don't know...just MORE.
Ugh, I can't stand this waiting. Waiting and waiting. Is this to be what my life consists of? Waiting and more waiting? God, I hope not. No, of course not. I've taken initiative. I'm taking initiative. Going for it. Getting a Masters.
All I want to know: Am I in or am I out?
Tune in for the answer.
I think it all started when I came to the U.S. when I was 4 and my mom tried to get me into a particular school for kindergarten. I'm not quite clear if this was an especially exclusive school or what. All I remember is my mom holding my hand tightly and crying as we walked back to the car because the school wouldn't accept me. Apparently, my inability to speak English at 4 years old meant that I did not have the mental capacity to learn. I think I remember that day vividly because even then, at that young age, I felt the prejudice of those school officials and the injustice of it all. I may not have known that that was what I felt, but I felt it nonetheless. To this day, their narrow-mindedness still hurts and amazes me. That school was in central New Jersey. My mom found another school for me to attend. I believe my mom explained to this second school what had happened. As it turned out, I was already ahead of many of my other classmates - I already knew my alphabet and my numbers and could identify them the fastest. My kindergarten teacher, I believe, called that first school and told them what asses they were. Ok, maybe he didn't quite use those words, but I do know that he informed them of their mistaken assumptions. Those assholes.
The second time I waited for an acceptance was for a specialized high school I applied to - Bronx Science. Four people got accepted in my eight grade class of 24 students and thank God I was one of them. Thinking about it now, I'm so glad my mom didn't have to pay for my high school. I had a great education, met a diverse group of people and had a pretty good time. I often see and read about how people thought high school was such an agony - the drama, the insecurities, the hostilities, the teenage angst. I don't know why, but I seem to have missed all that. Oh, I had some drama (like when I almost didn't graduate, but that's another story altogether), however, high school wasn't so bad. In fact, I have some pretty good memories. Lucky me, I guess.
Of course, senior year of high school comes with the college application process which is usually hell. Had to wait again. Got in to U. of Philippines. Got in to Binghamton. Cool. Rejected from Columbia. Eh, pretty much knew that was coming but it was good to dream.
Then, there was the more recent Fordham application. Got in, graduated, and was outta there. Unfortunately, my major wasn't my thing so there goes $80,000 worth of education down the drain.
Hence my application to Lehman for nursing prereqs. Got in. That was a no-brainer.
And now, my application to Pace and only Pace for the accelerated BSN/MS program. Finally. A way to combine my college major with a career. Nursing Informatics. Maybe that $80,000 will be put to use after all. Unfortunately, if I don't get in, I'll have to wait longer to graduate and I'm not getting any younger.
So here I am again. Waiting. Will I get in? I really don't know. My grades in college weren't the best but my GPA for Lehman is 3.97. That should count for something, right? And I got a freaking 780 in my GRE math and a 700 in the verbal. Not to be immodest, but that's a pretty good score (considering I guessed most of the math section). I found out my friend, who's a near genius (went to Ivy League, is a scientist who works for the government, etc) got a 720 in math. How the hell did I get a 780? I seriously think its one of the great mysteries of the world, or at least my world. I don't think my personal statement was that great though. I'm cursing myself for not putting more thought into it. For not being more funny, more interesting, more attention-grabbing, more heart-wrenching...I don't know...just MORE.
Ugh, I can't stand this waiting. Waiting and waiting. Is this to be what my life consists of? Waiting and more waiting? God, I hope not. No, of course not. I've taken initiative. I'm taking initiative. Going for it. Getting a Masters.
All I want to know: Am I in or am I out?
Tune in for the answer.
Labels: nursing
